Success is more than having a walled office

Now OnWeGo is all about looking forward ...doing new things ...never too late to change and all that. Dwelling on the past certainly wouldn't be seen as recommended practice by yours truly. But it seems I've had a bit of an epiphany moment or maybe an accumulation of meta-epiphany moments. The first one was last year when I came across the now empty offices of Golden Wonder. Stood there I remember thinking - "what memories of my '79 to '91 career golden years must live on between those walls!" - and then I wistfully moved on to Starbuck's. Then a second moment came when on a Google Earth hosted nostalgia trip to my old school - yes there was the prison ..and Hammersmith Hospital ...but why couldn't I see the school? I was shocked when I subsequently discovered that "Danes" had been demolished and relocated 20 years ago. And now recently a third moment - I learnt from a former Kraft Foods colleague that the old firm are vacating St Georges House in Cheltenham.

This one seems to upset me most. Probably because St Georges House is where I initially made it in my 2nd career in sales. Office + Secretary + Ford Granada with parking space were the trophies that marked my rapid ascent to HO Senior Management from a speculative beginning as a territory salesman in 1972. And yes - maybe because I also had this fanciful idea of dropping in there one day. Of being welcomed like a returning hero. Checking out my old office and seeing whether Dave Parry had ever managed to get an enclosing glass wall and door across his alcove - management had it removed - only senior managers were allowed a walled office!
So I am a bit disappointed to know that these special places from the past are no more. But I feel more for my former colleagues who made these places their career homes for life - they are very sad. They talk about the weekly reunion and "keeping it going" with mates they'd work with for 20, 30 40 years. And it's probably hard if not impossible for them to understand why I should feel happier because I switched jobs and careers several times.
But for me - and I think for more people than realise it - happiness in a job and career comes from achieving renewed success from the uncertainty of fresh challenges. From gaining acceptance and recognition from new peers. And from ultimately recognising that making a difference for a whole new family of people is infinitely more important and rewarding than a walled office.

Maslow rules OK!

A much needed makeover for Maslow's Hierarchy!" When I read that article recently I was decidely unsettled. Refresh Maslow? But I've been preaching his "hierachy of need" theory for over 30 years. I'm a total believer! And that's in Abraham's good old original version:

SELF-ACTUALISATION
SELF-ESTEEM
SOCIAL-ACCEPTANCE
SECURITY

SURVIVAL

I was reminded more than once of its continuing relevance when holidaying last week in beautiful South Devon. An entertaining cameo reminder came when a three-generation family arrived to set up for a day on the beach.

Food, drink, chairs and windbreaks to support Survival were tirelessly ferried from the car. Then their chosen spot was changed twice before a spot - defended at the rear by the sea wall and to the side by windbreaks - was seen to meet their Security needs. This was temporarily threatened by some self-interested positioning of chairs and disputes over towel ownership. But eventually this gave way to reconciling remarks like "eh this is the life!" and Social-Acceptance prevailed as Grandad and Dad teamed up to build a sandcastle for the little one. Unfortunately this became the usual contest of building skills as Self-esteem intervened. With public approval favouring son-in-law's efforts, Grand-dad clearly saw sand-castles as unfulfilling and ultimately went off searching the cliff face for fossils and Self-actualisation!

There are several views on how Maslow hierarchy can be improved but in general they tend to either adapt or add to Self-actualisation. Personally I can understand this because for me Self-actualisation isn't so much something you achieve but a state where you are always looking for something new.

And this was the insight I gained when chatting with two very fit and well-sussed "senior" walkers. They explained that they walk because they want to discover new places and also to progress beyond the 638 miles they've previously walked. What they are doing in the process is to continually re-ascend Maslow's hierachy each time they set off on new walking holiday. Relishing the challenge of fresh Survival, Security and Social Acceptance needs ...and boosting Self-esteem and Self-actualisation to new levels.

And for us starting over again later in life and work should be seen in the same way ...as opportunity not threat. We assume a state of finality and inevitability ...perhaps because of convention and maybe courage too?

How about taking a chance on change? It beats building sand castles.

look for the hero in yourself

It's been a week for stories about inspirational heroes. The Festival of Remembrance brought to our television screens pictures of servicemen who despite suffering terrible injuries were now tackling life with even more courage and determination.
For several days TV news featured the story of Paul and Rachel Chandler who survived their 388 day ordeal as hostages of Somali pirates and are now back home and building their lives again.
Another story to catch my eye - possibly because I'm  a fan of Italian football but I hope for other reasons too - was the one about Roberto Baggio. A legendary member of the "Azzuri" and former FIFA player of the year - Roberto is the 2010 winner of the Peace Summit Award, bestowed by Nobel Peace Prize laureates in recognition of his long-term efforts for charity.
There are several threads to this story that interest me:
- The diversity of his challenges:- Fundraiser for hospitals and earthquake victims. Fighter gainst bird flu. UN goodwill ambassador campaigning against hunger. Pro-democracy movement member supporting the release of Daw Aung San Suu Kyi in Burma.
-  His conversion from Roman Catholicism to Buddhism  and its suggestion that he was drawn to change as he moved on in life.
- And thirdly, that he should change from a career in football - better known perhaps for having ex-stars who remain in the game. Sometimes clinging on to opportunity until that runs out - rather than sensing that there could be something better out there and moving on to fresh challenges.
It's easy to draw a parallel for that last supposition with the thousands of people who are at the "fulfilled stage" of everyday careers. Clinging onto opportunity. Fearful that it will run out - but unable to accept that there are better things out there. Doubting their ability to reskill for a new "ball game" or fit in with a new team. Possibly concerned that their reputation will count for little in any new role. And I'll admit to having held those fears! But like so many others I found out that whilst thinking I'd achieved success as measured in conventional ways - a better success was to come along.

• The success of doing what I really wanted to do.
• The success of making a difference in a way that actually meant something.
• The success of doing a variety of new things that I wouldn't have previously thought I could. 

I used to remember Roberto for "skying" a penalty in the World Cup Final penalty shoot out against Brazil. Now I think of him as campione del Peace Summit and Onwego hero!
   

Blueberry juice improves your sex life!

Possibly because mathematics was my one and only "1st in class" subject - numbers seem to feature prominently throughout my working life. 
From first encounters as a bought ledger totalling trainee accountant - to "dims working up" building surveyor - then  activity sampling work study engineer I felt as secure with numbers as a bead on an abacus!
Next came the middle years in Sales and Marketing - winning business on the strength of sterling weighted rates of sale and category average margin contribution. Nielsen and MGS market data was my favourite read.
Now as an Acorn defined "affluent grey" self-employed 55+ Web Marketer I avidly scour the internet for OnWeGo relevant articles with conclusive statistical outcomes.
Yes it's true to say I have a passion for maths - if facts are supported by statistics I'm more likely to believe it (probably 40% more likely!). Facts like:
- When researching sexual activity of men and women aged over 55 the University of Chicago happened to observe that interest in sex amongst singles was 57% for men compared to 11% for women.
- 50 year old women have 5% to 8% better short-term verbal memory than 50 year old men as proven in research at the Institute of Education, University of London.  
- Blueberry juice improves the memory of pensioners by 40% in word association tests. As reported by the University of Cincinatti when testing pensioners who drank a pint of blueberry a day over 3 months!
So from the above we can easily postulate:
In single men and women over 55 the interest levels in sex compare approximately 5:1 and this correlates with an inferior short-term verbal recall level for men in the same age group. Verbal recall would of course include chat up lines so we see a likely explanation. Blueberry juice consumption has been shown to substantially improve verbal recall.
Ipso facto - drinking blueberry juice improves your sex life!
OK! Research Statistician may not be career shift number 7!!
But what I will postulate is that the web is a gold mine of knowledge which millions want to access and pay for! And that us over 55's have a wealth of accumulated knowledge - all of it experience ....and sometimes mistakes based! 
Getting started with an on-line knowledge based business couldn't be simpler.
- Write e books on your passion and create your marketable products !
- Publish on-line articles and write a blog to create awareness and attract customers. 
Just Google "e books" "article marketing" and "blogging" and see how much you will learn in a few hours.
Just follow your passion. It's more than "odds on" you'll be a success!     

Network your way back to work!

On Wednesday I went to my first networking breakfast in almost a year.  I arrive late at the new venue - a prominent football stadium - and drive in ironically cheering the one and only  directional sign I have seen on my entire journey?
Being late I miss the preliminary socialising and that's not good for me.  Any hint of social exclusion brings out an anarchic rebellious streak.  I have a "Reggie Perrin moment" and will the Breakfast Club host to fall from the chair where he commands attention during  his opening remarks. A video cameraman is filming proceedings - I  innocently obstruct his view and get asked to move.  
Breakfast is finally called. In the scrum for table places I see from the side the Retro  Bookmaker's  suit of the local networking pariah - and successfully avoid eye contact!
Surely a camouflaged look would help him avoid the Billy no mates table? 

Then I settle at the breakfast table between two welcoming and easy to chat with business women - a graphic designer and an HR and Change Consultant. I feel included once more - suddenly all the angst has gone and those rested networking skills are up and running.

After the customary "what do you do?" exchanges we refresh thoughts on successful networking techniques, talking about:

• The essential Elevator Pitch - how it must make clear what it is that you do and what that does for your customer.
• The essence of the elevator pitch - your "special widget" ...the distillation of what you do  that distinguishes you from others doing the same. This we agreed is the bit that networkers will remember and encourage them to recommend you.
• A story - a case study or anecdote that illustrates your widget at work and shows what it achieved.

Later on that day I was talking with a colleague about the challenges of getting back into work.   Recalling my earlier conversations we quickly agree that business networking offers a terrific opportunity for securing employment - and the disciplines of business referral are entirely relevant as well:

Nothing works better than a personal recommendation. 

And nothing makes making a recommendation easier than a memorable success story.

Although initially amused we also see the relevance of those "moments" I'd had earlier:

An unfamiliar journey made difficult by inadequate signs!

The feeling of "socially exclusion" by an established group.

Because these are the feelings that many experience when seeking employment after years in a secure familiar role. But just like my moments this morning - they are illusional. We create these perceptions ourselves.  And once set aside we find that all is familiar and we are as as good as we ever were. 

So that's the message to every jobseeker then-

Find your "widget" ...create your story ... get out there ...be early ...and don't wear a Retro-Bookmaker's suit

 

Forget the job - give me a short term contract

My friend Julie at Churchillbrook posted a discussion recently on the trend towards short term contract employment. A real prospect in the current business climate.
It immediately triggered a thought back to the 80's and early 90's when Total Quality Management ...Business Process Re-engineering ....Management Delayering were all  collaborating to change the shape and reduce the headcount of businesses.

For those of us that were "downsized" with no job to go to it was a traumatic experience! Many were a product of the good old days, when you could leave one job and find another with ease. And I think we also had an evolutionary issue to handle (inserting a quick disclaimer on any credentials as an anthropoligist) in that we are of a culture that expects  employment to be provided! Certainly, the suggestion once made by a famous politician of that era that to find work we should  "get on our bike!" was felt to be alien to say the least!
So not surprisingly the change in employment attitudes was evolutionary rather than revolutionary ...and perhaps tribal too.
But over time - sometimes after further redundancies -people accepted that things had changed.  We had our epiphany moment and decided that being part of an establishment headcount wasn't for us! And we came to discover how good it was:
- Feeling that what we did was for ourself and getting such a buzz out of it.
- Being appreciated more for our objectivity, expertise and contribution.
- Getting the refreshing variety of a new industry or company. 
- Having that great sense of independence and control over our own life.
- And because of that - and rather unexpectedly - feeling more secure than ever before.
But it did take us a while to recognise all these benefits - where was OnWeGo when we needed it??
Commerce and industry is however more accustomed to outsourcing these days.
Even smaller enterprises where much of the hope for growth must be centred, have a more businesslike attitude when it comes to outsourcing work to freelancers. They know that they need to flex their manpower requirements up and down as they plot a path to recovery and growth out of the recession.
So the quicker we recognise how much we get out of offering the same flexibility the better.
And then everyone is a winner! 

    

Now where was I? Because it was good!

It's been a strange week in the absent-mindedness department!
Monday it was the mislaid camera charger. Having got several people searching in the different places where I insisted it would be found - I then find it hooked over the office door handle.  Everyone seemed pleased for me!
Tuesday I discover that my red polo shirt has been stolen over-night from my washing line. I work out how with trellis and posts I can extend the height of the garden fence and improve security between me and the adjacent open plot. 
Wednesday - I find red polo shirt in the laundry basket!
Thursday, after shopping for provisions and settling back at my desk, the previously-left-behind shopping list reminds me that my salmon and mackeral need to go in the 'fridge. Three circuits of the house later and with no sign of the orange plastic bag a return trip to Sainsbury's is in prospect. Thinking I'm low on milk I check the 'fridge.  I am puzzled! I already have some salmon and mackeral? Why did I buy some more?  I was obviously experiencing some form of denial.
So I decided it would be a good idea to have a quick refresher on the causes and cures of absent mindedness.
First stage of self-diagnosis. Is my problem Retrospective remembering - forgetting whether or not I have done something?  Or Prospective remembering - forgetting to do something ahead of me? Not sure I can narrow it down really as symptons exist under both headings.
So I crack on with the research, and it comes up with some familiar results - which in itself I think is an encouraging sign!  Also encouraging is the suggestion that absent-mindedness is really just a form of intensely focused concentration! 
I particularly like the suggestions offered on howstuffworks Some very practical tips like:

Get organized.
Make lists and calendars and use them.
Have a set place to keep things and stick to it.
Keep all key information in one place.
When remembering dates, 'phone numbers etc., repeat them several times until they stick.
Focus on one thing at a time.
All useful tips on how to manage so called absent-mindeness - rather than trying to stop it.
And I think that's absolutely the right attitude.
Ask any creative genius and they'll tell you that their best thoughts come whilst in a trance. Try to find an old rocker who isn't convinced he wrote his best stuff while in "another place."
So what's all the fuss about ....we're in our own "another place"
It's legal. It's free. And we're doing our best stuff!

Is it who I think it is?

"Is it who I think it is?"
"I don't know ....who do you think I am?" is the ironic reply I've often whispered back.  But not any more. That funny in others but not in yourself senior's syndrome of insisting you recognise a stranger has now smitten me. Fortunately the lady at the checkout yesterday was good natured about it. Not so sure about her husband?
So I've been looking for a cure and it could be that help is on the way. 
In some collaborative research at Pennsylvania Uni's Penn Memory Centre (how many ironic remarks must they get in a day) they've established that memory decline is related to ageing.
Well yes I knew that - although I had forgotten?
All the evidence suggests that our anterior temporal lobes are critically involved in the retrieval of people's names.  And in experiments with photographed faces the recall level of the participants was significantly improved by passing a small electrical current through these lobes.
The scientists do point out that this is not the electro-convulsive therapy famously depicted in "One flew over the cuckoo's nest!"  Be that as it may - the equipment still won't be available for £25 alongside the tens machines at my local Llloyds Pharmacy.
So - interesting but not immediately helpful!
However, of more immediate help is an excellent workbook available from http://www.mindtools.com/ which gets you practicing the association technique for remembering faces and names. Hopefully that will cure me of calling Oz "Joe" when I'm in the office on Friday - and save me from that understanding look he gives!
I also like the help suggested by some research carried out in 2008 at the University of Michigan http://tinyurl.com/236d4d that showed that talking to people can significantly improve memory.
In one of the studies a  sample of 3600 people of representative ages, demographics etc were classified according to their frequency of social contact - how often they got out and connected with people. The participants completed the mini-mental state examination and the results clearly show improving levels of success commensurate with increasing levels of social contact. The study also reports that social isolation can have detrimental effects that are both emotional and intellectual - something referred to as the "Bowling alone" syndrome.

So there's a clear message for us here my fellow OnWeGo'ers - especially those of us in the work-from-home fraternity  - get too isolated and you may not remember your own name.
Get back out there and all those hazy and forgotten facts will come clear again.
I knew my frequent coffee breaks down at Costas were for a good reason.
I wonder if Carol Vorderman will be there again tomorrow?

Doing the unexpected!

We said good-bye to Aunty Ada yesterday - bless her!

Funerals always provide that unique behavioural dilemna - mourning for the loved one that we've lost - whilst trying not to over-enjoy the fun of meeting up with cousins we've not seen since the last funeral. Given the ironic sense of humour enjoyed by our lot it's always a particular struggle. Yesterday wasn't a problem though. Ada's wicked sense of humour was soon in everyone's minds ...even the vicar's during the eulogy.
Looking around at my cousins I was reminded that Ada was the last of the previous generation. We are the "silverbacks" now. And as I chatted with cousins, nephews and nieces I sensed another unusual behavioural trait amongst us which I'm sure  is again unique to families at funerals. We began chatting about life today in that understated slightly disappointed way that you do. Then inevitably we started to reminisce over the great times when we were all much younger. 
And as we rolled back the years ...chins lifted .....voices rose ....eyes widened ...shoulders  straightened ...hands waved energetically ...feet jigged around.   The "silverbacks" were kids again!
There is a lot of evidence suggesting that enviroment and circumstance pre-dispose us to adopt an appropriate behaviour and demeanour.  That as we mature within our family and workgroup, we calm down, become less assertive, less ambitious. Because that is what is expected!
Then suddenly something triggers a change - like the recollections of the cousins - and we shed about 30 years of demeanour!
Psychologist Ellen Langer's famous 1979 research study at Harvard, recreated in a recent BBC TV programme showed how people could "lose years off their life" by being kept within a recreated retro-time environment.
The "engineering" explanation for this seems to be that as we stop doing things certain areas of our brain network become disconnected.  But only disconnected - and there are some widely endorsed remedies for restablishing those networks.

• Physical exercise, anything from walking to working out.
• Mental exercise maybe from your favourite on-line game.
• Then there are remedies that exercise the creative and learning areas such as painting or writing.
• If you're up for it why not get both and learn something physical like Tai Chi or Salsa - highly recommended!
• But if you're really serious about reconnecting those networks and firing up those neurons.  Go for the best remedy of all. 
• Get yourself out of that demeanour dulling, stress generating, decline inducing job you're in and change careers   - come on OnWeGo ...do the unexpected!

Keep challenging those life long beliefs

I'm going to my Aunty Ada's funeral next Wednesday. She was 95 bless her! I didn't see her much in recent years but I certainly remember visiting her when I was a kid!
And two things always instantly come to mind:
Digestive biscuits ...dipping into the ever available tin of rejects bought from the McVities biscuit factory where she worked.
Laughing ...all the time, at her often outrageous observations on people and life ...offered with essential amounts of "Eff 'ing and blinding!"
The influence others have on us when we are small was discussed in an article I read on Tuesday.  
It reported on research carried out by Notre Dame Psychology Professor Darcia Narvaez into changes in the child rearing practices that shape the people we become in later life. And makes the point that well-being and moral sense are potential casualties of some of the changes that are happening.
The full findings which will be presented later this month at Notre Dame included some that came as no surprise ...but one or two that did. 
Such as you can't spoil a baby! I'd always argued against picking them up too much, and in favour of letting them cry. Wrong answer! Apparently crying causes the release of toxic chemicals into the brain. Professor Narvaez's research say we should be comforting the baby and keeping its brain calm at a time when it is forming its personality.
Such questioning of the things we've always believed can leave you in a bit of a quandry when it comes to offering seasoned wisdom.

Because we do believe those things that we have always believed to be true. Those things that someone (usually Gran) told us before we had even asked the question. Things like:
"Appearance really does count" - Which probably explains why the current fashion to be tie less annoys me!
"It's rude to interrupt" - Yes, I do tend to yawn a bit when in conversation.
"Manners maketh the man! - Clearly reflected in my obsessional and occasionally irritating habits of:- holding doors open for people, refusing to start a meal until everyone is sat at the table, and staring aghast at people who sniff!
Yet I'm happy to offer out my wisdom without qualification. And as my daughter reminded me this week ..."as Silverback my opinions are noted!"
So maybe seasoned wisdom is about occasionally questioning those deeply held beliefs.
Not just because we share them with others. But because we listen to them ourselves  -especially those self-limiting ones. Those ones that stop you from doing new things ...just because!! 
So no disrespect Gran. But to be true to OnWeGo beliefs I think we may have to look at one or two of yours, especially  "Accept where you are in life and be grateful."
But I tell you what Gran.  Aunty Ada was absolutely right with what she taught me - Compared to McVities those other Digestives are xxxxxxg rubbish !  




 

Time to boldly go!

I've noticed an increase in "head shakers" on the road! And they all seem to be hesitant  drivers.
I first spotted it on holiday in South Devon. The roads down there have this quirky habit of suddenly narrowing to single vehicle width. It proved a bit of a challenge initially ...but I soon got the hang of it ....learning that to boldly go was the better strategy!  The locals on the other hand seemed  far less confident and very hesitant. Sometimes with fairly chaotic consequences.

Like on the first Sunday when having looked for a pub that was still serving lunch we were disappointedly leaving the car park of the fourth.  With the old Lexus barely a wheel arch out from the walled entrance ...traffic from both left and right screeched to a halt, forming an  immediate jam!    Drivers looked bewildered and indecisive.  But being a London boy weaned on Hammersmith Broadway traffic and the like ...my natural instincts and assurance took over. I assumed control  of the situation and boldly drove out through the gap. Heads shook in a mixture of respect and I suspect  some embarrassment too?
Then the second example. Leading a lengthy convoy along the same road, I pulled out to pass a land rover. It had rather carelessly parked obscuring a "Road Works" sign. It was when I drew level with the Land Rover that I spotted the red traffic signal ...just before I saw the oncoming stream of traffic. Instinctively I braked and reversed.
But the gap in the traffic that I had vacated was no longer there!  The convoy I had led was now queued in orderly fashion behind the Land Rover.  As I reversed slowly back along its line - now leading a "convoy" of cars coming in the opposite direction - I noticed successive drivers shaking their heads. I don't think it was in respect. 
I won't go into detail with the most recent incident involving a couple in Tesco's car park last Sunday. I think I'm begining to get the picture now.
Yes it seems I'm of that age! When allegedly we become less aware of situations around us. When our kids say we shouldn't be allowed out by ourselves!
But who says that this is the way of it? Because I actually see it quite differently.
I've finally realised that the rest of the world is hesitant and indecisive!
Say hello to a Reckless Wrinkly!
Still with lots to do, and sharp enough to notice there is a reducing amount of time to do it all. 
So whatever it is you want to do - new job! new home! new places to see! new love in your life!! Get reckless and boldly go for it now!  

Just off for a creativity nap!

Getting back into work mode has proved very difficult after the week away in South Devon. 
Sustained concentration has proved to be the problem.  Not a new one for me.  "Concentration"  was regularly mentioned in school reports in my early years, so no ...I wasn't leaping to the age conclusion. But it was odd and a little annoying that the old brain was very creative when I had switched off for my holiday  ...but then decided to switch itself off as soon as I got back to my desk to work?
Then I came across an article in Science Daily which seems to explain what is going on. In an unusual collaboration between psychology, engineering and architecture academics in Sheffied, Bradford and Germany, researchers have shown how tranquility enhances the functionality of the brain. It seems from scans that areas of the brain connect up and are in sync when enjoying such things as the soothing roar of breaking waves.

This strikes two chords with me. I fancy myself as a bit of an amateur psychologist. One of my favourite "research" projects is the link between relaxation and brain activity.  We know for example that the mind becomes more creative as we go into a state of deep relaxation or trance. Who hasn't experienced a "eureka" moment on emerging from sleep. Creativity coaches advocate that "sleeping on it!" is good for problem solving and creativity.
Buddist chanting, Shamanic drumming, tribal dancing all bring about altered state and indications are that this occurs around the Theta state when brain waves are between 4 to 7 Hz.
Hypnotherapists lead their subjects into this same state to access the sub-conscious and the deeply held beliefs and memories that sit there. Uncovering these as they resolve phobias and other behavioural change issues. 
Sportsmen and musicians getting "into the zone" relax their minds in what is an apparent accessing of a programmed code of subsequent peak performance.  
Meditation brings inner calm and strength through contemplation  ...perhaps the same is happening in prayer.
Plenty of similarity here. And then, when you think how much of the brain's space and functionality is un-used then all sorts of opportunities are imaginable!
So ....lots of reasons why meditation, power napping, walking through the park - whatever is your "switching off" habit - are to be encouraged as the ways to unlock our full mental capability.
And I guess as well I'm going to have to declutter and finally decorate my office into a more tranquil environment.
But I did say "two chords?"  The second one is ...I do indolence very well!

Maslow rules OK!

 "A much needed makeover for Maslow's Hierarchy!" When I read that article recently I was decidely unsettled.  Refresh Maslow? But I've been  preaching his "hierachy of need" theory for over 30 years. I'm a total believer!  And that's in Abraham's good old original version:

SELF-ACTUALISATION

         SELF-ESTEEM      

    SOCIAL-ACCEPTANCE   

              SECURITY             

                  SURVIVAL                 

I was reminded more than once of its continuing relevance when holidaying last week in beautiful South Devon.   An entertaining cameo reminder came when a three-generation family arrived to set up for a day on the beach.
Food, drink, chairs and windbreaks to support Survival were tirelessly ferried from the car.  Then their chosen spot was changed twice before a spot - defended at the rear by the sea wall and to the side by windbreaks - was seen to meet their  Security needs.  This was temporarily threatened by some self-interested positioning of chairs and disputes over towel ownership. But eventually this gave way to reconciling remarks like "eh this is the life!" and Social-Acceptance prevailed as Grandad and Dad teamed up to build a sandcastle for the little one. Unfortunately this became the usual contest of building skills as Self-esteem intervened.   With public approval favouring son-in-law's efforts, Grand-dad clearly saw sand-castles as unfulfilling and ultimately went off searching the cliff face for fossils and Self-actualisation!
There are several views on how Maslow hierarchy can be improved but in general they tend to either adapt or add to Self-actualisation. Personally I can understand this because for me Self-actualisation isn't so much something you achieve but a state where you are always looking for something new.

And this was the insight I gained when chatting with two very fit and well-sussed "senior" walkers.  They explained that they walk because they want to discover new places and also to progress   beyond the 638 miles they've previously walked. What they are  doing in the process is to continually re-ascend Maslow's hierachy each time they set off on new walking holiday.  Relishing the challenge of fresh Survival, Security and Social Acceptance needs ...and boosting Self-esteem and Self-actualisation to new levels.
And for us starting over again later in life and work should be seen in the same way ...as opportunity not threat. We assume a state of finality and inevitability ...perhaps because of convention and maybe courage too?
How about taking a chance on change? It beats building sand castles. 

Do we go looking for the age-ism thing?

Maybe sometimes we go looking for it? The age-ism thing I mean.
They've installed self-service checkouts in my local Sainsbury. I was pretty cool about it. I'd quickly got used to them elsewhere and so confidently went straight in as less certain shoppers queued at the attended checkouts. But the "orange sashed" helpers had to hover around me! You could read their minds. "He'll need some help!" Which I didn't! Well not until something totally new (and unnecessary in my view) came up on the display. So there they quickly were ...rescuing the old duffer whilst the attractive woman at the next check-out looked on ...with a condescending smile!
Same sort of thing when buying my tickets from a young bloke at the Odeon last Saturday.
I asked for two tickets ...adding with mock disbelief  "....and one of those will be a concession!"   "Yes ...don't worry!" he said "I've already taken it off!" 
What a liberty. Thinking I was 60 already! Patronising young herbert.
More was to come as I took my small bag of pick-a-mix and joined the queue for the "take in" ...that essential element of the "Fantastic Film" experience!
I couldn't see what was happening ahead of me at the counter.  People carrying skip fulls of popcorn and buckets of cola (clearly frequent customers) blocked my view.
So when a baseball-capped youth suddenly appeared I perhaps did hesitate for a second before proffering my modest purchase.
"Put it there" he said with disdain. "Where?"  "There!" He impatiently pointed to the weighing plate.    "£3.35!!"   No please or thank you!  I wandered off  nostalgically recalling evening-suited cinema managers and usherettes with ice-cream trays.
But on reflection I wonder how much of all those experiences was fantasy and over active imagination ...as opposed to reality.  Yes of course we jump to conclusions. It's the way the mind works. Understanding begins by making a generalised association with preconceived thought. Very often thought that has been influenced by external opinion!  Then we learn a bit more and we deal with things according to how we experience them and how they sit with our values system.
Which is how we need to treat the issue of ageism in employment. Pre-conception ...prejudice are natural and inevitable generalised reactions. They have very little lasting meaning or importance.
And we should deal with them as just that!

Getting back to work when you're over 50!

"Getting back to work when you're over 50?"  It's a question that occupies the mind of more and more people these days. In the previous post we talked about it and by way of a practical sequel here are some thoughts on doing something about it.
Start thinking change and opportunity! The "unthinkable" of not getting the same job again needs to change to "thinkable." Be prepared to do something different. More than that  ...want to do something different. It can still be the same profession ...but there are different ways to secure it:
- Renewable short term contracts or Interim Assignments can develop into on-going arrangements with the same employer.
- A portfolio of 2 or 3 part-time roles with different employers not only provides variety but can also be more profitable. And the market is there with smaller businesses seeking a viable way of securing your kind of expertise.
Change employer attitudes and perceptions! Rather than accepting that we will be at the back of the queue for jobs ...we need to be up front confronting employers' negative preconceptions:
"Less adaptable to change! ...Uneasy with a younger boss ...Over-qualified!"  Whatever the concern ...anticipate them.  Recall personal situations that not only show that you've experienced and therefore understand the particular issues ...but also demonstrate your positive attitude and handling of them.  Get good at turning problems into opportunities.
Create a compelling CV! Is your's a CV that lists the jobs you've had over many years accompanied with impressive data on turnover, budgets, people etc. That's not persuasive!  With an emphasis on your most recent past, list your achievements ...the things you achieved ...the differences that you made. Identify your distinctive skill, talent or quality that makes you successful ...make it concrete not too abstract!  Develop compelling stories that describe these achievements and illustrate your distinctive skill at work. Practice telling these stories. Work on a compelling verbal CV that you can get across in a minute.  

Get out and talk to people! Getting that job you want is a full on marketing exercise. It needs other people to help you to make a success of it.  So talk to the professionals. Career Counsellors tend to be nice people!
But also talk with your pals and your business network. Tell them what you are looking for and why ( your 60 second verbal CV.) And ask them to let you know if they hear of something on the grapevine.
When I worked in Outplacement 20 years ago I learned that 75% of job vacancies are never advertised. Even in today's recessionary times there are jobs out there needing to be filled now or in the immediate future.
The people filling those jobs will know people that you know. The more people you talk to the nearer you will be to those opportunities.

Knowing when it's time to change

I came across some interesting statistics in the last few days:
"823,00 UK pensioners over 65 have returned to work in the last 6 months!"
"1 in 12 British Pensioners are now working!" 
There are of course several financial reasons for this: It's well known that annuity rates have fallen ...I watched with dismay and disbelief as my pension forecasts fell. Other less well known financial reasons include Gordon's raiding of the pension pot by £100 billion when removing tax relief on dividends.  And 12% of  65 - 74 year olds still having a mortgage of £60,000 to pay off according to Aviva! And so the bottom line is that people, particularly outside of the public sector, are finding it increasingly difficult to manage on pension income.
But another reason for this trend is that an increasing number of pensioners actually want to continue working. Which is why these statistics from Age UK made disappointing reading:
"over 170,000 people over 50 have been out of work for at least a year, an increase of 52% since the beginning of the decade, and the highest figure in ten years!"
Yes it is disappointing to read that this is the case. But it is also disappointing that a potentially discouraging statistic is put out. Getting a job when you are out of work has always been difficult...at any age! And especially difficult if you've never thought about change affecting you!
Have you noticed how so many things are changing that we just seem to accept:
- Cheque books are not used in so many places now.
- Good old Woolworths and others have shut down as we shift our shopping to the internet.
- We even scan our own shopping at the supermarket checkout.
- CCTV watches us wherever we go.
- We cheerfully sort out our re-cycleable household rubbish.

Yet when it comes to our job ...we don't expect this to change. And we can't seem to accept it when it does happen. That is the key theme in the excellent book "Who moved my Cheese?"  It can be read in a couple of hours but the lessons will last a wee bit longer!!
And the key lessons taught by the different behaviour of its four characters when discovering that their "life long" hoard of cheese has finally been eaten are:

• Accept that is has happened. It's not coming back and you have to move on and be prepared to find something different somewhere else.
• Accept that it was always likely to happen, that the signs were there. And that it will probably happen again some time and to prepare for that eventuality.

And I learned every truth in those lessons 20 years ago ...eventually!
These days I very happily find my own cheese.  And I am always looking for the freshest because it is so much better! 

Why should I lose weight?

"Reduce the amount you eat just a little each year!"  That advice from Gardner Mulloy on how to prolong fitness into later years was given out around the time he won the Wimbledon Men's Doubles Title in 1957 at the age of 44.  I've never forgotten him saying it...obviously! And I can't remember how many times I've quoted it to others....
...and also illustrating the point about how we eat more when we're younger with my personal anectdote of a hungry 16 year old with 6 cheese rolls in my pack up lunch! 
A photograph of me taken during the recent World Cup shows that lately I possibly haven't been telling the story quite so much! 



But now 4 weeks on....I'm 12 pounds lighter, feeling decidely fitter and also a little bit self-satisfied...especially after reading an article in Thursday's Daily Mail  
Dealing with the worryingly accepted issue of obesity in this country, the article reports on a study carried out by Lighterlife on our eating habits.
It seems that when it comes to over-eating we all blame everyone but ourselves. We blame our parents for telling us to finish what's put in front of us.....yes I can relate to that.
Us fellas blame our partners for putting too much on our plates...yes I've used that one.
The ladies blame us, in that they serve themselves the same size portions as we get  ...heard that too!

We blame food manufacturers for stealthily upsizing food. Apparently a hot cross bun is now typically 40% larger.
The confectionery guys are at it too so we can blame them. Have you seen the huge bag of M&M's on promotion at £2...a nice round price!!
And finally we blame the catering industry who from coffee to burgers are incentivising us with clever pricing to trade up in size...in more ways than one?

And of course blaming everyone else is a lot easier than blaming ourselves.  I've found that three things work for me to keep weight down:
1) Recognise that sugar is an addictive substance that is put in food to make it more'ish.  Which is why I will finish a pack of Digestive biscuits in a day. And why if I "quit" ...after a week the craving stops.
2) Understand that unpleasant "hunger pangs" encourage me to eat so they'll go away, and so I eat plenty to be sure. When in fact the pangs are simply the digestive acid my belly has been "trained" to create in anticipation of the amount of food I'm eating. Eat less and the pangs reduce!
3) Accept that if we really want to remain fit and active and keep our weight down to a healthy level then we have to start by shifting the blame for over-eating back to ourselves.
Gardnar Mulloy is still lean and fit and playing tennis in his 90's ...and probably glad he never listened to his mother!

Selective memory

Is your memory as good as you would like it to be?
My "ex" would often tell people that she was a former Southern England ballroon dancing champion although she never was!
On the other hand I'm absolutely certain that I can remember horse-drawn refuse lorries ...and old boys on bicycles extinguishing street gas lamps.
But it is quite possible that my "ex" honestly  believed that she was a dancing champion ...and that my recollections of horses and lamps are completely phoney! Well that is the case according to a report in The Daily Mail last Monday. Referring to studies carried out with 1600 students at the University of Hull it seems that 20% of us have vivid recollections of events that never happened! Events as memorable as seeing dinosaurs and being kidnapped. Apart from highlighting the fallibility of memory the researchers suggest it also offers explanation of how people can have differing accounts of an event or conversation when recalling the detail.
Personally I find this quite reassuring! Knowing that others have memory problems. Mine are the popular varieties: The common short-term recall and the more exclusive retrospective black hole!
I know that psychologists dislike comparisons between the mind and computers but I think there is a useful metaphor here.

I see my retro black hole problem being a "hard drive" storage issue. Loads of data ...which is only to be expected after all these years. But also too many "corrupt files." 
The corrupt files are bad memories. We try to bury them in the archive but they just sit there slowing the system down and impeding access to the good memories. The answer? A "disc clean up and defrag." Going in and rooting out those bad memories. Which of course can be done with the help of a trained hypnotherapist but there are some simple DIY techniques that are also highly effective.

• One is just talking it out with somebody else. It's amazing how what we see as major issues others can see quite differently.
• Another is to write down a full account of the problem. Then take the piece of paper and screw it up and throw it contemptuously over your shoulder.
• Try also picturing yourself in a cinema watching the problem as a movie on the screen. Then step out of yourself and stand to the side looking at yourself watching the movie. Tell yourself that you have now moved on.

Practice these simple reframing techniques over and over and they will work... and you'll find that remembering the good stuff will come easy.
So let me think... when did the "ex" and I win the Southern England Ballroom championships?

Let's just get on with it!

You can't help liking Mayor of London Boris Johnson.

He is what I call a "Go for it" as opposed to a "better not." You know what I mean? Some of us will have a go at things. We have an instinctive feeling that this is the right thing to do. We know we should look into it more and be better prepared... but that if we did we would delay matters when there is more than enough good to come from just getting on with it.  And all of that wonderful "Go for it" attitude is reflected in today's launch announced by Boris of a brilliant cycling scheme for London. Although admitting that "things aren't fully in place and there will be teething problems!" it is up and running. A network of 400 docking stations within the capital with 6000 cycles available at a daily hire charge of £1 providing Londoners with a healthy and carbon free commute to work.

This particular "Go for" initiative probably grabs my interest because it's about bikes. And buying my bike for my 54th birthday when I hadn't ridden one for 40 years was probably my very first "Go for it" that launched me into the OnWeGo idea.

"Go for its" don't particularly get on with "better nots." "Better nots" generally tend to see the problems in things and avoid doing them. In fact they seem to avoid doing most things. Although they do seem pretty good at booing from the sidelines when a "Go for it" is having a go at something. And they are great at giving post-mortems when "Go for it" ideas crash.  They worry too much about others watching them and what they will be thinking. And they let this hold them back and limit their enjoyment of life.

Worryingly...I'm sure as we mature we can gradually morph into "Better nots!"

"Better not change my job to something I really want to do!"
"Better not start up that on-line business idea I've got!"
"Better not sign up for that writing course.!"
"Better not take up martial arts!"
"Better not wear my shorts on the bike!!!!"
 And you know what the remedy is for that don't you.....as Boris demonstrated when with hair and jacket akimbo he waved the Olympic Flag at the Bejing closing ceremony....just go for it!

The Meaning of Life!

What is the meaning of  life? The Monty Python version cracks me up... but the events of yesterday with its own cast also made for an interesting story.
Lynda sent a message that her dear Aunty May had died. She was 92 and lived in a care home. A really good one where she was well cared for. But the image of her being raised from a chair in a mechanical hoist with an expression that mixed pain with indignity is for me the one that gets you thinking  it was a happy release for her. Her only daughter is away on the "holiday of a lifetime to China" for 10 days.. but May won't mind having to wait for a few tears to be shed.
Ted the window cleaner called. We share tips on curing golfer's elbow and we put the world to right. So I was disappointed when he said he was retiring..."Have too...arthritis in the back" he explained. But I excused him when he said he was 68. Respect Ted. You're a fit old beggar! He's looking for a warmer climate now to ease his aches and pains.
Grand-daughter Jas finished her year as a Teaching Assistant at the local academy. The kids gave her a farewell present and so she was in bits. But she's off to university in September and will already be looking forward to that.
It was Eddie's leaving day at the local middle school. He had an amazing end-of-school report that described him as "an old fashioned gentleman" and "like a tardis... with an outside that totally disguises the unexpected capabilities inside of him!" He'll be keen to see what the girls are like at the academy! 
Charlie also had a leaving day...making the step up from First to Middle School. He wasn't overly sentimental. Sky Sports was talking up the new football season. "In your face!" was his only expression of emotion to me when the screen flashed Ajax 1 Chelsea 0.
And Ronnie finished pre-school nursery en-route to first school. Apparently the staff and mothers were in bits. Each little 'un was presented with their own pre-school history...lovingly captured in numerous photographs and messages. Ronnie proudly showed me his... although now clearly bored by its familiarity he did hurry me through it. But not before I spotted a clearly special moment for both the staff and Ron:
"2/2/09  Stood up to pee for the first time!"
Way to go Ron. OnWeGo!

Retirement? We can't afford it!

Well I go to the foot of our stairs! There is me championing OnWeGo with its selfless self-fulfilling philosophies for carrying on working ...and it could be that for us lads it might just be a necessity!
It seems that as far as our better halves are concerned one in four of them is happy being a kept woman!
That was one of the shocking findings in a survey of 1400 women carried out by myvouchercodes.co.uk.  It included the ubiquitous list. This particular one ranking the items that women thought their partner was likely to pay for:

 Food Shopping - 81%. 
Meal - 77%. 
Holiday - 69%.
Mobile bill – 55%. 
Appliances – 51%. 
Household bills – 49%. 
MOT – 43%. 
Clothes – 31%.
Salon visits – 28%.
Farhad Farhadi, personal finance expert at MyVoucherCodes did express her surprise that the "kept woman" attitude prevailed today, and offered the view
"Perhaps some women get caught up in the fantasy of living a life of luxury and having a lavish lifestyle funded by a wealthy man, but I think a line needs to be drawn somewhere and women should still want to be independent and successful!" 
And maybe Farhad's last comment is our "get out of jail card" lads? In which case as you're collecting your better half from the hair dresser's you may want to casually mention another survey with list of course.This one is by  Forbes Magazine  and it shows "The Fastest Growing Jobs for Women..."

Based on Laurence Shatkin's forecasts for the 21st century the prediction is for considerable growth in the health sector. Whilst drawn from US economic forecasts there are good reasons to anticipate a similar situation in the UK. The most in demand jobs for the coming years are listed as:
Home Health Aides.
Skin Care Specialists.
Athletic Trainers.
Physical Therapist Aides
Dental Hygienists
Veterinary Technologists
So it could be good news all round lads. Help paying the hair dressing bills and our own personal trainer as well!